Who are You?

Who are you? When the fur hits the fan, what will you become? Living perpetually outside of what you know, what you're familiar with, who will you become?

This is one of the things I am most apprehensive about. Those leaving in two days will be spending three months in the zone between comfort and panic; the learning zone. I'm coming later, so I'll have slightly less time in that zone, but that is not the point. The point is this: the further you get outside of your comfort zone, the more layers are pulled back from whatever façade you knowingly or unknowingly present to the world.

It is like languages. You can learn, master, become bilingual, trilingual, multilingual in any number of languages. But no matter what, in times of duress, stress and difficulty you will always revert back to your mother tongue. End of story.

So then, what is going to happen up there? When we are stretched thin, stressed out and ready to break - as will inevitably happen at least once - what will the "mother tongue" of our personality sound like?

Than, I suppose, is part of my fear. That there is some dark, dirty part of my personality that I am subconsciously suppressing which is just waiting to rear its ugly head for all the team to see. That my personality just won't cut it under pressure.

The prognosis is not all bad, however. Even as it is possible that we could, I could, crack outside of our comfort zones, it is just as possible that we have some hidden reserve - of leadership, strength, who knows what? - that is just as eagerly waiting to be let go.

As of yet, God only knows.

But we will find out soon enough.

Michael
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=Annwas Adeniawc=